bye bye Valentine

Is it weird that I'm anti-Valentines day? It's one Holiday I can do without. Screw all the mushy flowers and heart shaped boxes of candy. Bleh! I probably feel this way because when I was single...Valentines Day made me want to puke and I'm still feeling it. Did I get anything this year from the hubby? Lunch...pho to be exact. Nothing fancy. No roses- they die so I don't care. No candy- and that's fine because I'm already fat enough. I made chocolate covered strawberries though and they we're beautiful. I worked all day yesterday which was good. We were busy because everyone wanted to look hot for their dates. I ended up spending the evening with my friend Linda and her friend Jessica. Linda cooked dinner and then we went downtown for a very short time. Now I'm at work with a raging headache and I just want to take a nap. I need a dinner date....craving that crack called Pho!

Can't I just enjoy myself?

I know life will never be perfect and 100% worry free...but damn! Life is too short! I feel like it was soooooooooooooo long ago that I smiled so much my face hurt and laughed until I cried. I don't want to get older and become some bitter old lady. Why is everyone always so serious? Why is enjoying yourself frowned upon?(well it is my house) This is why I enjoy the few close friends I have. Because with them....I can laugh, play and truly RELAX. Stress will be the death of me. I handle it well but I can feel it taking a serious toll on my health. To me...the perfect life would be to do what I have to do to pay my bills while enjoying every sweet thing along the way. You have to stop to smell the roses...you just have to. Some ppl dont get that. I do and I will.

This and that

Chau and I attended a "sex toy" party last night and I must admit; I enjoyed myself. Toys don't scare me;-P I was a good girl and didn't drink...actually it was because I was super full from our dinner at DK Sushi. Otherwise I'm sure I would of had a drink or two. I had one appt on the books when I walked into the salon today and before I knew it, I was booked all day! It was awesome!!! Being busy at work is super important to me. I hate being bored at work, plus that usually leads to me snacking and thats a no no right now. I am determined to lose 20 pounds by summer and another 10 soon after. Chau and I are on a mission! I am so dissapointed in myself for letting things get this bad. I have gained way too much and feel completely horrible about myself. UGH! Anyhoo....it's Superbowl Sunday and I'm at my fathers on the computer. I dont care about this Superbowl. It's whateva.